In the latest issue of PARABOLA is an excerpt from FLUTE SOLO by Matthew Kelty,a Gethsemene monk who died recently at age 95. He wrote,” I am not a flutist, yet I have a flute and I play it, play it for no purpose and for no ears save God’s and my own.” He goes on to say that his purpose is not to become an accomplished flutist and that if it were, perhaps, that would be “the end of joyous freedom.” He says that he fears his “small joy [would be] driven away by concern for doing it well and turning a natural act into performance. ” This set me to thinking about why I am writing this blog and I am led back to my original desire which was both practical and relational. I wanted a container (a holding place for my ponderings and wanderings) and I wanted a simple way of sharing my musings with others. Matthew Kelty reminded me that for me writing and reading are simple pleasures that I enjoy both for their own sake and for the connection to others that they can bring. In this way I am much like my dog Toby who enjoys the simple pleasure of being outdoors for its own sake, but whose enjoyment is amplified by the companionship of others. I am deeply appreciative of your companionship as I read and write.
aholdingplace 
The thing I most love about you, Joan, is that you are Yourself. That’s my highest praise for anyone.
Your blog is a perfect example of expressing that authenticity. And that’s a good thing. (Sit down, Martha, you’re not the only one who can use that sentence.) Betty
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“— I have a flute and I play it, play it for no purpose and for no ears save God’s and my own.” Sometimes. Yet if I am aware that others (besides God) can hear it (me), some new element enters. And sometimes I play to/for someone(s) I know is/are listening, and maybe start caring about their reaction(s).
I’ve thought recently about taking some lessons. Pondering why. One thing I love about A Holding Place is how Joan’s sharing her own journey encourages me and others to share theirs.
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This post really spoke to me. About 6 months ago, I decided to stop taking improvisational piano lessons. It was a big deal for me, as my teacher was wonderful, supportive, and most encouraging. As a result, I struggled between feeling a sense of failure that I either couldn’t – or wouldn’t – advance to the next level…….and another feeling that, maybe, being ‘accomplished’ wasn’t really what it was all about for me – it wasn’t the thing that was going to give me the pleasure I sought in playing the piano. I am so glad that very recently I let go of that pressure to feel ‘accomplished’. Instead, I play and play and play, and I love it! And should anyone want to listen, that’s fine with me…..mistakes and all. I am not perfect, nor do I play perfectly……..and I can’t tell you how nice it feels to just love the pleasure of simply expressing myself. So to Joan and the memory of Matthew Kelty, I say “Here’s to enoying our freedom and comfort with the ways in which we express outselves..”
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And I am deeply appreciative of your companionship as my heart listens to your heart. Thank you!
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How lovely it is to be intentionally invited in to the meaning of your process. There is certainly a parallel for me in that I take pleasure in the artistry and craft of your writing, but also in the relational way in which I experience the resonance of your experience and insight in my heart. I am grateful for both in their own right and for the sacred point of their intersection.
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