For a moment I thought the sign
on the back of
the van ahead
said, “How is my
driving? My mother’s number is … “
This led me to
ponder the many
tasks a mother
has. Even when her kids are grown
and gone, it seems
a mother’s work
is never done.
~JDG
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Moonlit Revelry
Out on the lawn the fairies dance
not in squares but
rings. They circle
in and out and
all about the tiny, white-capped
stalks. There they’re joined
in revelry
by others of
their kind, but we are warned to stand
apart lest we
get snared and dance
our lives away.
JDG
The Word Went Out
Apparently the word went out
and a critter
council was held,
as it often
is, in the early morning haze.
Crows, woodpeckers
and jays chimed in,
frogs opined, bees
buzzed, dogs barked, and even the cows
agreed – it was
time for the sun
to fully shine.
JDG
In Time
Sometimes we have to grow into
the words we read.
I remember
puzzling over
Faulkner’s words and asked my teacher
how there could be
such a thing as
victory through
surrender. He paused before he
said, softly, “In
time you will come
to understand.“
JDG
Namaste
Sunday in the insight meditation practice group facilitated by my friends, Kay and Phil Davidson, Kay read a passage from Mark Nepo’s THE BOOK OF AWAKENING in which he says that each of us is born with an unencumbered spot of grace which, in the normal course of things, gets tarnished or covered over. Occasionally the covering gets worn through and we and others get a glimpse of “that uncorruptible spot of grace at our core.” He goes on to say,”When the covering is worn through, we have moments of enlightenment, moments of wholeness, moments of satori…moments of clear living when inner meets outer, moments of full integrity of being, moments of complete Oneness. And whether the film is a veil of culture, of memory, of mental or religious training, of trauma or sophistication, the removal of that film is the goal of all therapy and education.”
Recently I was fortunate to be in the presence of that unencumbered spot of grace as I witnessed an exchange between two of my granddaughters which I wrote about in my January 31 posting, “Two Poems, One Heart”. Mark Nepo gave words to what I saw embodied for a moment by these two young girls and reminded me that each of us, at our core, has that same unencumbered, uncorruptible spot of grace. In that moment I was given a tangible experience of what is meant by “namaste” when “the divine in me bows to the divine in you”.
Numerators
On our vast world, the limitless
has placed limits.
The hairs on our
head and our days
are numbered. We can learn to count
and to be held
accountable
in many ways.
The Seven Noble Truths and the
Ten Commandments
are among prime
numerators.
JDG
My Part
“Of course I know I had a part in it,” I will sometimes say when telling someone about a conflict I am in the midst of, but then I go on to describe in some detail all that the other person said, did, or didn’t do and don’t focus at all on my words and actions. Recently I have been rereading ANATOMY OF PEACE by the Arbinger Institute which helps us look at all the ways we avoid really looking at our part in disputes and conflicts.
The profound process of self examination this book presents is framed within a story about parents of troubled teens who spend a weekend coming to understand their part in what goes wrong and learning how to contribute toward helping things go right. While their children are participating in a group wilderness experience, the parents are led together through an inner process inspired by Martin Buber’s distinction between an “I-Thou” relationship where people are seen as fellow human beings and an “I-It” relationship where they are seen as objects. Their learning is facilitated by a Palestinian whose father was killed by an Israeli and an Israeli whose father was killed by a Palestinian and focuses on four main patterns of self deception ( we each have our favorites ) which box us in and are used to justify our perceptions and behavior.
This business of thinking, seeing, and behaving toward others as though they were objects rather than human beings was brought home to me on an ordinary Saturday afternoon several years ago when I was with my young grandchildren. We were stopped at a light that had just changed to green when the person behind me began blowing his horn. This is a pet peeve of mine and I handled it in my usual fashion by driving very very slowly, really just inching along, through the intersection. One of my granddaughters looked over at me, probably having observed this particular response before, and said, “Gaba, stop it. They may have some place they really need to be.” The people I saw simply in terms of their capacity to irritate me, my granddaughter saw as human beings with needs and desires of their own. People still do occasionally blow their horn at me when I don’t move quickly when the light changes, but my granddaughter’s words stay with me and I no longer inch through the intersection and a small bit of peace has been added to this troubled world.
This Year I Choose
This year I am choosing to focus on only one practice: to really get to know that space in me after a stimulus and before a response. I want to discover what that place is like and what thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations visit there. I want to sit with these thoughts, feelings, and body sensations and get to know them in their own right. Once I sense that they have said all they have to say, I will thank them and continue to wait until a clearing comes. And then? And then, I’ll see.
Even as I write this, the thoughts come: “You can’t do this after every single stimulus.” “You’ll never get anything done.” “This is going to slow everything way down.” The feelings are excitement edging toward anxiety. And the body sensations? My lower body is at rest, but I feel alot of agitation in the area of my heart and throat. I will sit with these and other visitors until a clearing comes or until I choose to say goodbye for a while with a promise to return if not to that particular stimulus to another one. My commitment is to the practice itself not to an outcome.
This year I choose.
Every Which Way
So many roads converge ahead.
The signs point in
all directions.
Every which way
you turn, there’s one for the taking.
There’s a low road
and a high road,
one well-traveled,
one that makes all the difference.
I guess my road
will have to be
one not taken.
JDG
Finding Our Ways
All the trains have left the station
but not with me,
although I left
the station too.
Our final destination will
be the same – still,
I’m glad I found
a way less fixed
to travel there, even if I had
to jump some tracks,
annoy some folks
who move in packs.
JDG
aholdingplace 